Duncan had never been so happy to see Benny interrupt as when that exuberant seven year old powerhouse came bounding over to gain the adults' attention once more. Marsha had to resort to putting off asking her serious question and Duncan breathed a sigh of relief. Had she inadvertently hooked up with Genvieve during the night? Timing would have been right for that and who knows who all Genvieve has for friends. Duncan's imagination was almost as wild as his kidlette nephew's energy, only less productive.

As soon as he was able to do so, Duncan made a hasty retreat and excused himself to head home. He had reassured Marsha that she could call him later when Benny went to sleep or even use her new found skills as an e-mail author. As far as he could tell, she seemed appeased and he of course was greatly relieved. It seemed like he was sure having to buy time lately just to be able to think through what he would have to say. It just didn't seem like this was normal for him. He was used to thinking quickly on his feet, even if it had elements of total BS to it. It had to be a sign of how Ben's death was still getting to him.

Back home, he made a conscious effort to walk past the computer and instead, went right in to take a nap. Talking late with Marsha one night and then the next with Benny, left him worn out. He had noticed a bit of a sore throat, but attributed that to the yelling and cheering they had done at the soccer game. He had to start thinking about going to back to work in the morning and couldn't even consider that he might be coming down with something. That's all he would need!

As tired as he was and as motivated as he was to take a rest, his mind didn't seem to be cooperating. He struggled to not think about Marsha and Genvieve, but wasn't having much luck. The phone wasn't helping either. He got two phone calls just as he was about to drop off, so he turned the ringer off the phone and tried once again to settle into a short nap.

Duncan sat up, disoriented. He looked at the clock and found that his short nap had turned into a long night's sleep. Not only did he not have time to deal with Marsha and Genvieve, if he wasn't careful, he would be late for his first day back at work. He raced through his morning toilet and sped out the door, grabbing his suitcase that he hadn't opened in ages. "It must be a type of Murphy's Law or something" Duncan thought to himself, The faster you want to get somewhere, the more things slow you down. Traffic even seemed thicker than I remember."

People at the office were friendly and welcoming. They had missed him and also had to increase their workload some to compensate for his absence, so they were especially anxious for his return. After several informal as well as formal meetings, Duncan finally got a chance to settle in a bit in his office, and in front of his computer. He doubted he would ever look at a computer again in quite the same way after his recent Internet experiences. Already he was trying to sort out what sort of software he would need to get hooked up to the net at work so he could surf when things were slow.

Afternoon rush hour came all too soon for Duncan as he had just barely begun plodding through the stacks of work that had backed up while he was gone. He was a bit pleased with himself that he fought off the temptation to stay late and keep working. Instead he acknowledged to himself that work had waited this long -- it could wait some more.

Walking in the door at his place, he immediately noticed the remnants of his company over the weekend. Coffee cups here, soda bottles there; the bed still unmade. The house seemed especially quiet and Duncan wasn't sure he liked that kind of quiet any more -- not sure at all!

Duncan stared into the refrigerator half-heartedly as he tried to sort out what he needed to do next. On the one hand, he needed to get his momentum up again to talk to Genvieve. On the other, it might be wiser to see what had happened with Marsha, just in case she had already met up with Genvieve. Before he could make his decision, the phone rang. It was Marsha. A chill went through him.

"Hi there guy!" she cheerfully greeted him. "Figured I would try to catch you before you got on that computer with your line tied up. BTW," she continued, "What happened last night? I thought you told me to call or e-mail you."

"Well, my question is, dear Sis, did you drop a Mickey or something in my coffee yesterday? I came home thinking I was going to just take a quick snooze and lo and behold, I woke with barely enough time to make it to work on time."

"Oh that's right!" Marsha exclaimed, "You started back to work today. Sorry to go on like that. How was it?"

Duncan filled her in on the highlights of his day and slowly began to feel more at ease. She sure didn't sound like a woman who was in a fit of jealous rage at her late husband, or upset with anyone. He might get through this after all. Then, her tone changed and she broached the subject again.

"Listen Duncan," Marsha began, "Benny is watching a video so I have 22 minutes left to talk with you about something serious. Is this a good time?"

Duncan could not figure a way out of it so he grabbed a cup of old coffee and nuked it as he assured her that she had his attention.

"Well I told you that I was on IRC all night, right? I was on it most of the day today too since I didn't have to go to work. Well, something happened I am really bothered about. I met this guy Joel who apparently has been Dan's best friend for years. His wife died 3 1/2 years ago after a long illness. From what I understand, it was really hard, and she required a great deal of care. Joel was a real pip about it, Dan said, and apparently took care of her till the end at home. I guess it took a lot out of him for a long time. He is living in Adelaide, Australia now of all places!" Marsha paused for a minute.

Duncan could feel the tension easing as he thought to himself. "She didn't meet Genvieve. This is something totally different!" "Gee that must have been rough Marsha. I am confused though, what exactly is bothering you?" Duncan asked.

"Well I had such a wonderful time with my friend Dan and I really enjoyed all his friends. You should have been there, the witty repartee was exciting and fun!" Marsha shared, "but I really felt a connection with Joel. We had so much in common. Do you know he told me he redecorated his house almost the minute he got home from the funeral?"

Duncan still felt a loss as to what Marsha was trying to tell him but he did his best to follow along, interjecting humor. "Well did you both exchange Martha Stewart tips, and that's what has you riled? Is he a snob about wall paper?"

Stone silence met his failed attempt at humor. "Sorry Marsha. I guess I just am not following you." Duncan confessed.

"Duncan, I am bothered because Joel and I hit it off so well. We talked most of the night Saturday, on and off most of Sunday and almost all Sunday night, as well as almost all of today. I had an incredible time. It bothers me a bunch! I don't even know the guy and I just lost my husband! How in the world can I be having this much fun with electrons on a computer screen?"

Duncan could hear Marsha's muffled crying. "Darn it!" she said, "Now I am crying and I only have 8 minutes left to talk undisturbed. I need your honest answer Duncan. What kind of person am I? What must you think of me? You know I loved your brother with all my heart don't you?"

If Duncan had been there with her, he would have hugged her tight in an effort to comfort her. His words would have to do for now. "Listen Marsha, I think it is great that you are having a good time on the Internet. I am not about to judge you and there is nothing to judge. I know you loved Ben and he loved you. You were a good wife to him. You don't need my permission to have fun or even to start dating. Follow your heart and listen to your own good advice. Remember what you told Benny when we were at the Humane Society?

Marsha had to think a minute "Hmmm, well I guess I told him that just because he loved someone, it didn't mean that there wasn't room in his heart for anyone else? Is that what you mean? Well I am NOT about to fall in love with anyone right now." Marsha said a little too loudly, pulling herself together. "I just haven't been a typical widow and I was really worried about what you thought of me."

"I want you to know that I am behind you 100% no matter what you do Marsha. Honest. But, I have to say, we can't always choose the timing of when we fall for someone or even who we fall for."

"Duncan, you know what? I think... " she began before she was interrupted. "Mommy, can I watch that video again?" Duncan could hear Benny ask her in the background.

"No Benny. One video is enough for right now. Mommy will be off the phone in a minute and we can work on your new sticker book." Marsha was now dealing with a whining child. It was hard for her to stand firm and also concentrate on the conversation so they wrapped it up fairly quickly.

"I will be on later Duncan, will you?" Marsha asked.

"Probably if I can avoid conking out again," Duncan replied. "I do have someone I need to talk to though for a while if they are on." said Duncan, hoping Marsha wouldn't with whom.

"Hmmm, that Guinevere person on your notify, eh?" Marsha teased. "She sure chose an exotic nick. Joel taught me about 'notify' so that we could connect easier and I remembered that name that came up on your computer."

Thankfully, before he had to respond or correct her, Marsha said "good-bye" and went to live in sticker book land for a while.

Duncan decided to not put it off any longer and turned on the computer. He hoped Genvieve would be on. It seemed like the right timing for her if she was up late. He tried to remember how he had decided to tell her and frightfully was drawing a blank. He logged onto a server and waited for it to scroll past the status information. His notify showed that she was on. "Here goes," he thought to himself as he typed out "/join #Truthtime" to create a channel. She was there with him in the channel almost as soon as he had invited her.

"Hallo my new friend Starbuck" Genvieve typed in quickly, "How is you? I not see you long time!"

"We had trouble with bad splits last time I saw you," Starbuck reminded her, "and I am now working again. How are you?"

"Goood! I am the goodest in long time! :) :) "

"Genvieve, there is something I have to talk to you about," Duncan began. "This is really hard for me to say, but I feel you have the right to know."

"Oooooo this sound bad, no?" Genvieve typed.

"I wish I didn't have to tell you, you seem like such a nice person, but I have some bad news." Duncan went on, scrambling for the right words to actually type. "I don't even know where to start!"

"Starbuck, is ok. My teeth old and make no blud," Genvieve tried to reassure him.

"Maybe I should just tell you what my name really is. It is Duncan Saunders. I'm Ben's brother. Genvieve, Ben... Duncan struggled to get the words out. "Ben was in a terrible accident and he died. I am so sorry to tell you."

There was no response. Duncan felt the pressure mount and sheer nervous energy kept him writing to try to explain. "I ended up with Ben's computer and that is how I learned about the two of you, but I just didn't know how to tell you. I didn't know how you would take it. I was so worried for you, for his family."

"Genvieve, I am so sorry. Will you ever forgive me?" Still no response. Duncan tried a "/ping Genvieve" and got a " ping response of 7 seconds which was not bad, considering she was half way across the world. Now he was really worried.

"Genvieve, are you here? Please say something; anything." Duncan pleaded.

His words just hung on the screen not changing. He read and reread every word over and over as he waited, trying to will them to hold some relief. None came. In fact, the next thing he noticed was that Genvieve had signed off.

There were no words to explain the feelings that coursed through Duncan's very spirit. Had she seen what he wrote and was so upset that she just signed off? Had she been stuck in some computer or server trouble and missed everything? Should he wait in case she came back? How could he have just blurted it out like that? He had waited this long, he could have warmed things up more and led into it more gently. "What a jerk I am," he thought!

Not sure as to the next step or how to comfort Genvieve if that was even possible, Duncan put up an "away message." He would leave the computer on and hopefully she would message him if she came back on and wanted to talk. Disgusted with himself, and having lost all his appetite, Duncan went over and sat down, looking at his brother's picture. "I'm so sorry Ben," Duncan said aloud. "I guess I sure screwed that up!" Despondent and exhausted, Duncan dozed off, Ben's picture in his lap.

The computer's ringer insinuated itself into Duncan's dreams before they had a strong foothold. He went over to check to see if Genvieve was back on and messaging him. "Dang!" he said to himself as he saw several messages from Marsha instead of Genvieve. He didn't really feel like talking to her right then so he left his "away" message on, but curiosity got to him. He did a "/whois Brandy-" and found her on a channel "Words_On_A_Screen."

Duncan wondered what that channel was all about so he did a "/names #Words_On_A_Screen." The only names he saw were Marsha's nickname and Joel-'s nickname. It did feel odd to have her so involved with another man, although he didn't begrudge it to her. He just hadn't really thought of how life would feel down the road when she might be involved or even married to another man. He had been enjoying the role of the supportive man in her life and in Benny's life. In some ways, it was a role that he might even be comfortable about being in permanently, but perhaps it was better this way. All this just made Duncan all the more aware of the empty nooks and crannies in his life without a lover or a family of his own.

Still not knowing what to do about Genvieve and seeing that Marsha was properly occupied, he turned his computer off and turned his attention to some work he brought home before going to bed for the night.

Marsha was pleased to see "Starbuck's" nick when she got back on the computer that night. She felt she had just dumped her heart out to Duncan and then had to leave it hanging because of Benny and timing. She felt somewhat reassured, but there was still a large part of her that didn't know what to make of these feelings at all.

With the recent holidays and Valentine's Day coming up, maybe she was just feeling a special vulnerability right now. Marsha was also aware that she had been lonesome for quite some time, even with Ben still alive, so this time with Joel felt especially nurturing.

Since Duncan didn't seem to be answering her messages, and Joel wasn't on yet, Marsha decided to try and check out the /MSGs from the 40's magazine to pass some time while she waited. She was surprised at how quickly she was catching on to this computer, and she even handled the stray "come on messages" from strangers looking for G*D only knew what.

In looking at the magazine, the first thing that startled her was the music that seemed to go along with it. This computer age was really an amazing thing! No wonder Ben had been so enthralled with it.

Marsha wove her way through the cyberzine, chuckling at some of the jokes in "Funny Bone" and really appreciating the column "Tech for NON Techs." She didn't understand all of it, but could see how this would be a very useful section to pay attention to as she tried to learn more about this new frontier. She even thought she would come back and explore the sites in "WWWW" when she had some more time. Marsha made a mental note to herself to remember the "Collective Muses" area if she got back into writing again. Maybe she could see about sending in some of her old pieces since they seemed to want people to share some of their writing.

"What's this?" she asked herself as "DEAR NETty" loaded onto the screen. "What a hoot!" she thought as she realized it was an online advice column. That is just what she needed -- oh how fun!

Marsha thought for a minute about what she wanted to ask this DEAR NETty and began writing.

"Dear NETty,

I can’t believe I am writing this but I really need to talk to someone and you are the closest to a DEAR BLABBY there is here. I have only been on the Internet a few days and I have met someone that I feel very close to. He was introduced to me by an old friend that I looked up and found on the net, so I know he is a real person.

It is like nothing I have ever experienced before and I don’t know what to do about the intensity of it all. My friend and I have stayed up and talked all day and night for the last few days and I feel like we have gotten to know each other deeper than I have ever known anyone in a long time -- maybe ever. We seem to have so much in common. It doesn't seem possible that this could be happening. In some ways, we are only words on a screen to each other but I find myself being so much more emotionally involved than I know how to handle.

Also, my husband died recently and I know I am vulnerable right now as I have been really lonesome. How can I be feeling so strongly about another person so soon when I loved my husband deeply? This person has put a song in my heart and I find myself thinking about writing again. Is this real or is this just something because I am lonely and I am new on the Internet? What will people think? What will my young son think? What do you think?
Signed,
Confused, but singing"

As Marsha looked over her letter and sent it off, she thought to herself that even the act of writing to this DEAR NETty was almost, in itself, an act of faith in the net. For all she knew, Dear NETty could be a man in Smelling Salts, Idaho that had never helped anyone before. On the other hand, from looking at the past entries, as well as NETty's well-thought-out replies, she felt good about sending in her letter. Hopefully it wouldn't take too long for a reply.

The timing was great because just as she finished her letter, Joel-'s nick popped up on her notify. She raced to him, humming a song to herself that seemed deeply familiar, but she felt sure she had never heard before. "Don't fail me now, DEAR NETty, she thought as she made up a channel to use for her visit with Joel- "/join #Words_On_A_Screen."