I was told recently that sometimes I am too often a champion for causes and am not at all afraid to take on difficult subject. I actually took that as quite a compliment. Even though I also get teased for being such a "do-gooder," I continue to believe in the inherent good nature of humans. The more I see the sadness and fear and trouble in this world, the more I try to gain comfort by attending to the many acts of kindness that are everywhere, even here on the net.
The internet, even with all of its troubles, is really quite a miracle that connects us all in amazing ways. No doubt many people have received e-mails from people requesting help in some way or another. One mail I got had to do with asking for cards and email to be sent to a dying child who was trying to get the most mail. One was to send email with prayers for a seriously ill person. Most recently I received 4 e-mails about people searching for kidney matches for a dying toddler. My heart goes out to all these requests and I am sure that the connections of the internet will increase the chances of finding the needed help.
I saw a bumper sticker recently that at first I almost thought was the same one about random acts of kindness that I have on my own bumper. On second look however, it said something like "PRACTICE SENSE, NOT RANDOMLY." I had to chuckle. A great example of how both those thoughts might be combined is with the project that GYPSY, a new regular on IRC and best buddy of a long time regular, is doing. She noticed my signature in my email and took the time to tell me about her newly created project. She has made the commitment to herself and others at Landmark that soon she will be passing out 10,000 brightly colored flyers inviting people to actively practice random kindness. People can then choose to write back about what they did and what that experience was like for them. This is how she explains it:
Side 1.
To turn it into art, use the space below to write down what you did and/or how it felt, and send it to us by folding the paper so the address on the back shows clearly. Maybe there'll be a magazine or newspaper story. Anything can happen!
Side 2
Top third: Life is a dance -- dance with everyone
Middle third: An Invitation to the Dance -- mailing address
Bottom third: Dedicated to the possibility that there are no strangers
The genesis of the project is my concern that we, as a society, are becoming more and more isolated from people and groups that we do not closely identify with, and less and less frequently take responsibility for that which occurs around us. There are so many disenfranchised groups... the homeless, the mentally ill, the children/adolescents with uninterested or unavailable parents, the shut-ins, the frail elderly without caring family to help them, the warehoused elderly in the nursing homes, etc. So many of these people are out of communication with any source of help, social nourishment, or even a watchful eye to make sure they're all right. It is more comfortable to "forget" that they exist and that even the most difficult of them are deserving of human contact and a hand to hold. I remember a time when community included everyone in the neighborhood, and people helped each other just because help was needed.
Since I believe that global transformation occurs within the individual, I wanted to cast seeds that might land in people's hearts and minds, seeds that might cause them to connect for a moment with another in a new and unexpected and moving way. I believe that kindness breeds kindness... if I commit an act of kindness, it feels good and I want to do it again. Likewise, if someone is kind to me or to another within my range of awareness, I will be subtly jostled in the direction of being kinder myself. As I practice, I will develop new eyes with which to see new possibilities and opportunities for caring kindness -- eventually, I will be transformed, and if you are too, we will be a start toward the critical mass necessary to transform society.
Not only do I think that Gypsy's idea is a wonderful one, I believe that it will snowball into making our world a nicer place. Who knows, it might just be one of those "hundredth monkey" things that helps us all evolve a bit.
Here are just a few of the ideas that seem well suited for the internet:
Related to that, I have heard of people starting a continual and cumulative package with photos and things to share. One person starts out with a small package and sends it to the next person who adds to it then sends it along to the next person. It keeps circulating and when it comes back around, each person replaces their own original stuff and adds new items and the circle keeps going. It is helpful if people have a specific list of participants and make some agreements about how much to share and how quickly to send it along so the package doesn't get held up.
I have only heard of this using snail mail, but it seems like it could be easily adapted to the net. It could even combine the two mail services and send discs of gifs or wav files in snail mail to ease download time and postage.
On IRC, there are many ways to be kind. Get creative.
It would be great if people would share what things they have done themselves, or things that have had done for them that has added to the "KQ" (kindness quotient). You may share your acts of kindness using an easy form here. It is up to you if you want this to be anonymous or not. Your idea will appear below.
The internet was responsible for my having an especially wonderful Mother's day this year. Eight years ago my own mother died unexpectedly of lung cancer. It was very hard and as anyone who has experienced loss knows, I still grieve for her in many ways. I have lots of her things around to refresh my memory of her as time goes on, one being an empty perfume bottle. Five or six years ago, I thought it would be nice to actually get a bottle of her favorite perfume, called SECRET OF VENUS. Unfortunately, I was disappointed to find out that it was a discontinued brand. I started looking for it in small cities that we might visit. We had no luck and my husband Bob even tried while we were in Australia.
Since the perfume was from Paris, I asked my friend PMA who is in a
French part of Switzerland, if he and his wife had heard of the perfume.
They apparently tried several places to find it, again with no luck. He
could have left it at that, but PMA then told me that he did a search on
ALTA VISTA and voila! Success! PMA hooked me up with a business on the
net that is a clearing house for hard to find perfumes from all over the
world. I was soon e-mailing and communicating with the owner of that
business in south US and actually was able to get his LAST 4 small
bottles of this perfume. He was also unable to get any more. The perfume
arrived the Friday before Mother's Day. My IRC friends, my family and the
Internet gave me quite a gift of kindness this year: a special treat from
MY mother!