As I geared up for my own holiday, I tuned into some tension that seemed familiar to me, but that I had not really understood completely. I still don't, but it doesn't keep me from trying to understand. =)

This year, Chanukah came very early. By the time this goes to press, Chanukah will be over as this year it ran from sundown December 5th through sundown on December 13th. While the actual dates on the Jewish calendar remain constant, since the Jewish calendar is lunar based, instead of solar based, the days seem different every year.

Growing up, Christmas was a magical time. We would drive to see the delights of the Christmas lights, had our picture taken on Santa's lap, had all sorts of holiday fun with decorating trees at our Christian friends' homes, in addition to the incredible joys of Chanukah. When my friends would brag about all the gifts Santa had brought them, my solace was that there were 8 days of Chanukah and I had plenty of gifts to be excited about as well.

There were hurtful times as well during the holiday season. All the events in school and the community were for Christmas. While I still know all the Christmas songs (and love most), I remember feeling out of place at a very young age when I had to sing songs that were different than what my culture taught me. I would mouth the words, hoping no one would catch on. Looking back, it was a sad pressure and one that I did not want my son to have to face.

As a result, I started asking early at his school as to how they would handle the holidays. They assured me that they would be having "HOLIDAY shows" and not just Christmas shows. On first glance, that sounded wonderful, but when I explored a bit further with them as to what would be included and offered my help in any way, it turned out they were going to sing all Christmas carols. In their thinking, as long as the songs were about Santa Claus and not about Jesus, then they were just doing a holiday show. I was floored.

At my work, there is a huge move towards "Honoring Diversity." It is a county mandate as well as part of the values thrust from the administration. We have e-mails monthly celebrating different cultures and giving out information about how traditional holidays might be viewed by some cultures. A well-known example is of course how Native Americans might experience Thanksgiving quite differently from mainstream U.S. Some people even feel differently about Halloween. We were asked to not wear devil costumes so that we didn't offend any Christians who believe it is wrong to be playful with the concept of the Devil.

Even with all of this, as my work cranked up for their holiday spirit, they sent out e-mails about buying Christmas decorations for the youth in detention. I suggested that they honor diversity even more by decorating with more than Christmas in mind. Many people responded that they appreciated that idea. They even had a big meeting and were going to make the holiday luncheon more culturally sensitive. Again, I was pleased but when I listened further to what that meant, I found it was the same idea that happened at my son's school. They excitedly told me that the decorations would be the colors of the season (red and green) and would focus on Santa Claus. Needless to say, I was stunned.

In both instances, I faced a deep dilemma. Here both places were trying very hard to be culturally sensitive. I seriously appreciate that. No way did I wish to hurt anyone's feelings, nor did I want to discount their efforts. However, I doubt if Kwanza's colors of the season are red and green. Chanukah's colors are certainly not red and green. Santa Claus and variations of Father Christmas are also associated with Christmas.

After some sensitive discussions, at work we are putting more effort into having decorations that reflect the diverse group of staff and kids that we serve. A growing number of us are involved with adding to the festivities and trying to make sure that the kids from all nationalities see something with which they can relate.

At my son's school, my son and I spent time sharing some of our Chanukah traditions with his school. He felt so proud to be invited by the PRINCIPAL. He beamed as he talked about his holiday and as he gave out dreidels, pages to color and Chanukah candies or "gelt." It was quite a different experience from my childhood.

An interesting note is that his teacher is from India. She doesn't celebrate Christmas at all and had just celebrated Diwali. In an effort to honor HER holiday, we went to a store with everything from India and bought her a sandalwood pen. Alden struggled with his 5 y/o new writing skills to write her out a card wishing her a happy belated Diwali. She was so touched that he had shown her the respect of what had meaning to her, she decided to share some of HER customs and traditions for her holiday as well. She later told me that she went to the library and checked out books to learn more about Chanukah. Everyone won.

I would imagine that some of the mainstream (at least in the U.S.) might have the experience that politically correct pressure is taking the Christmas out of Christmas. I might even imagine further that there could be some resentment brewing. Instead of having this be a time that divides us on some level, we all have the opportunity to truly celebrate and honor our diversity. I believe that there is room to have stores carry items for other cultures' holiday celebrations. Radios can just as easily fill some of the air time with rich melodies other than just Christmas songs. I believe there is room on bulletin boards AND in holiday shows for more than just Christmas decorations or songs. It is not necessary to take away or dilute Christmas holidays, but instead it is a matter of honestly INCLUDING other holidays.