Gift Wish List

Anything marked like this would be extra wonderful to receive. If you wish to know what my friends may have already gotten me that I myself do not yet know about, contact my friend Joshua O'Madadhain or my soon-to-be-wife Stephani.

• One can always make a donation to charity (or a worthy cause) in my name. Always feel free to do that and ignore the rest of this list.
  Suggestions include the Oregon Food Bank, United Cerebral Palsy, any of the entities listed on my "how can one person take positive action" list, and TAG SEP. Or you could simply go to the Hunger Site and press the Donate button once for me.
• I cannot say no to massages. I am not sure that it would even be possible for me to have too many. Especially feet. Bliss . . .
• Once I was interviewed on the nightly news. My friend Derek videotaped the segment, but I do not have a copy, and I'd love one. If you are interested in pursuing this, Joshua O'Madadhain (see above) knows how to get in touch with Derek.
• Please destroy Monsanto for me. Take it apart, sell off its assets, arrest appropriate members of its upper hierarchy, dismantle any of its subsidiary companies that are equally evil, the works. Why? Well, just to get a small sample of the reasons why, see the movie "The Corporation." But there are a lot more reasons out there.
• I have a near-infinite need for folks to drive me places, chauffeur me around. Usually these are trips that will take a while, say at least two hours up to half a day.
• If you want to help me take a big trip, I would love to personally experience zero gee. Thirty seconds or so in a ballistic flight would be fine, for those of you who cannot afford to send me up to LEO (Low Earth Orbit). :-)
• Read the short story "The Velveeta Rabbit" (that is not a typo!). You'll laugh, and make the world a more cheerful place thereby.
• There are several people whom I would love to just talk to for a while. Say, an hour or two over lunch. No formal interview, just a chance to see what they are like in person, as opposed to in their writings, in movies, on the campaign trail, whatever applies. The list would be much longer if I could resurrect the dead, but since I cannot do that, for the moment the list is: Alfred Molina, John McCain, Ursula K. Leguin, Joss Whedon, Susan Sarandon, Kurt Vonnegut, Garrison Keillor, Drew Barrymore, Brent Spiner, Orson Scott Card, Jimmy Carter, Amber Benson, Jodi Foster, Weird Al Yankovic, Dean Kamen, Natalie Maines, Sarah Vowell, Gregory Benford, Leonard Pitts Jr. and the brothers behind Homestar Runner. If you want to arrange this, fine with me. :-)  (I count myself lucky that I have already had a chance to briefly meet Douglas Adams, Robert Forward, and Nancy Kress, and not-so-briefly meet Octavia Butler.)
• Someone who actually has a PayPal account could do me a favor and give Fredo Viola a few bucks. His homemade video for his song "The Sad Song" is certainly worth it.
• I would pay real money to see Aurora Chorus do a performance of "My Shoes" by the Bobs. Just imagining it makes me smile.
• I would also pay real money to see Aurora Chorus do a performance of "Where Love Goes (Sito)" by the Mint Juleps (off of the album "Mickey Hart's Mystery Box").
• I would love to have a chance to play Nomic with at least two other people, for at least an hour. Bonus points if the other players include Jeff and Joshua.

Perhaps you are thinking, why does Alex of all people need other folks to get him books? Ah, but many of these are out of print and not so easy to find . . .

Note: if an entry says "anything by [Author X] except [some specific titles]," that almost always means that I have those specific titles already, rather than indicating that I think those specific titles are no good.

• Quotidian, by Goody Cable (I already have Quotidian II)
• Gibran's The Prophet (I want to release a second copy of this on Bookcrossing)
• The following books by Esther Friesner: Hooray for Hellywood or any of the Chicks in Chainmail series (except the first one).
• Anything by Barry Lopez (one of the true kings of atmosphere and ambience), except Desert Notes and River Notes.
• Not Much Just Chillin', by Linda Perlstein
• 50 Ways to Love Your Country, by MoveOn.org
• The Intuitive Body: Aikido as a Clairsentient Practice, by Wendy Palmer
• Outwitting History, by Aaron Lansky
• The Fall of Baghdad, by John Lee Anderson
• The Salmon of Doubt, by Douglas Adams
• Melancholy Elephants (the collection with this title, not just the short story), by Spider Robinson
• House of Stairs and Others See Us, by William Sleator (I want to release the second one on Bookcrossing)
• The Smell of Telescopes and A New History of Infamy, by Rhys Hughes
• The Codex Seraphinianus, by Luigi Serafini
• The Gumshoe, the Witch and the Virtual Corpse, by Keith Hartman
• Another copy of Stranger in a Strange Land, by Robert A. Heinlein. I gave mine away to a needy soul again. On second thought, forget it; just buy it and read it yourself. Save me the trouble. :-) :-)
• Any of the anthologies of math-based science fiction that were edited by Clifton Fadiman
• The Secret House, by David Bodanis (the larger version that has pictures, not the smaller paperback that is text only). Since I often use this in my classes, more than one copy would be a wonderful thing.
• The latest edition of The Way Things Work, by David Macaulay. Since I often use this in my classes, more than one copy would be a wonderful thing.
• Uncle Tungsten, by Oliver Sacks
• Any of the books off of the Tofu List that I give out in my classes. Some of these books I want because I no longer have them, some I want because the students are slowly wearing my copies out, and some I want because they should really be much better known and I want to release them on Bookcrossing.
• Any of the math texts in the sweeping series by Bourbaki. Preferably in the original French.
• A scientific or medical French dictionary
• An etymological French dictionary

Note: if an entry says "anything by [Musician X] except [some specific titles]," that almost always means that I have those specific titles already, rather than indicating that I think those specific titles are no good.

• If you've really got money you need to get rid of quickly, you could purchase the cool-looking 5-CD set entitled "Brain in a Box"
• Whichever CD by Polychrome it is that has "Transparent."
• The soundtracks to "The Ninth Gate," "Eyes Wide Shut," "Kiki's Delivery Service," "The Fellowship of the Ring" and "The Two Towers."
• Any CDs by the Mint Juleps (except "Mickey Hart's Mystery Box")
• "This One's from the Heart," by James Darren
• "Ol' Yellow Eyes Is Back," by Brent Spiner
• "Medicine Music," by Bobby McFerrin
• "Bare," by Annie Lennox
• Any early Eurythmics CDs
• Schoolhouse Rock! (the 5-CD set, or one of the smaller 1-disc samplers)
• "Shoggoth on the Roof" (yes, this is indeed a Lovecraftian parody of "Fiddler on the Roof")
• "Blind Man's Zoo" and "In my Tribe," by the 10,000 Maniacs
• Any Weird Al CD which has "The Saga Begins" (his Star Wars song set to the tune of "American Pie")
• "Insh'Allah" by Heather Alexander. All of her other CDs I have already.
• Any CDs by Escape Key, except for "Shadowbeast."
• A CD featuring the "Trans Poly U. Fight Song" jointly sung by Tom Smith, Joshua O'Madadhain, Phil Foglio and Bobby McFerrin (at Mr. O'Madadhain's option, Mr. McFerrin can be replaced by a bass of Mr. O'Madadhain's choice; at Mr. Foglio's option, his part can be sung by one of his minions).
• A CD or tape featuring the fan filk expanded version of Whedon's "Firefly" theme, preferably with Michelle Dockrey of Escape Key singing lead.
• Any CDs by French singer Étienne Daho. (I think I have the spelling right. If he did a song titled "Épaule tattoo," that is the right gentleman.)
• Any CDs by French singer Francis Cabrel (except "Quelqu'un de l'intérieur").
• Any CDs by French singer Yves Duteil.
• Any CDs by Dead Can Dance except "Into the Labyrinth," "Spiritchaser," and "Toward the Within." I have those three already, and they are good.
• I really adore Celtic music. The only problem is, I have a lot of it already. :-) :-) But there is always more. I would love to have anything by Clannad (except "Lore" and "Landmarks"), anything by Capercaillie (except "To The Moon" and "the blood is strong"), and anything by the Rankins (except "Uprooted"). "No mermaid," by Sinead Lohan would be good.
  Mom went to Nova Scotia a while ago, and from her descriptions they have really great music there. I particularly covet a copy of whichever Rankins album Mom bought on CD (I think it is called "The Rankin Family").
• I am also developing a taste for music that, to steal a phrase from Mila, I think of as "worldbeat techno." Again, the only problem is that I have a lot of it already. But I would love to have anything by the Afrocelts --- formerly known as the Afro-Celt Sound System --- (except "Sound Magic" and "Release").

• A videotape of (or simply a chance to see) the movie "Black Micmac." Despite the title, this movie is in French (well, primarily French --- the other languages are subtitled in French).
• A videotape of (or simply a chance to see) the episode of the Daily Show in which Jon Stewart (briefly) interviews Sarah Vowell. She's almost exactly my age, and she likes politics, history and "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" --- how can I say no?
• A videotape of (or simply a chance to see) any episode of Liquid TV (a show that aired on MTV in the early 1990s) that features the character Winter Steel. Especially the one in which Winter Steel encounters the hippie family in their hippie van.
• A videotape of (or simply a chance to see) any of the following hard-to-find movies: "Babacuaria," "The Century of the Self," "Bande à Part" and "The Ice Pirates."
• Videotapes of any episodes of "The Muppet Show" or "Muppets Tonight"
• If such a thing exists as a DVD of all of the now-dead short-lived show "Nowhere Man" (starring Bruce Greenwood), I want it.
• Repeat the previous entry for "Jack of All Trades" (starring Bruce Campbell), and for "John Doe" (starring somebody not named Bruce).
• A chance to see any of the following music videos: "Hurt" (by Johnny Cash), "Goodbye Earl" and "Landslide" (by the Dixie Chicks), "Fortress Around Your Heart" (by Sting), "Take On Me" (by A-ha), "I Know What I Know" and "The Boy in the Bubble" (by Paul Simon), and also any videos by the Indigo Girls, Tears for Fears, the Police, Enya, Peter Gabriel, Weird Al Yankovic, Sarah MacLachlan (except "World On Fire"), Clannad or Fleetwood Mac. (This does not mean that I want to own these videos, or even necessarily own any albums by these groups unless so specified elsewhere.)
• Blank videotapes (relatively high quality is nice)

• Silk socks --- and if they go halfway up my calf, so much the better
• Wool socks
• Largish cotton socks in the following specific colors: royal purple, indigo, periwinkle, robin's-egg blue, forest green, hunter green, emerald green, terra cotta, salmon pink, Cherokee red, ruby red and electric scarlet
• Largish pink and/or purple socks with hummingbirds on them
• A sweatshirt that says "UC Sunnydale." :-) For sizes, see Things to Avoid.
• A Powell's sweatshirt (preferably not white). For sizes, see Things to Avoid.
• A T-shirt with either exactly one, exactly four or exactly six parrots on it. For sizes, see Things to Avoid.
• A T-shirt that says "My minions are everywhere." Grey on black might be a nice color scheme, but then so is sunshine yellow on forest green, or white on sky blue. I leave it up to your taste. :-) For sizes, see Things to Avoid.
• A black button-down short-sleeve shirt, with thin streaks in the black like veins in marble. Top choice for the color of the streaks is electric purple; emerald green, blood red and bright white would also be good, but only one of those colors, not a combination. Silk would be my first choice for material; if not that, then one of these slick artificial fabrics. I have no idea if such a shirt exists, of course, but it sounds fabulous. In fact, if it does exist, get me half a dozen. :-) :-) For sizes, see Things to Avoid.
• Cedar clothes hangers
• Here's a tricky one: since I often use my umbrella as a cane, I tend to wear down the end (the top, not the handle). I would love to get something replaceable to cover the tip: a rubber chair foot, a steel tip, whatever would work . . .
• Duffel bag, preferably red
• A very bright, extremely durable and rugged flashlight.*  Right now, I don't need one of the small-yet-bright LED ones (because I have one), unless it's an RGB LED like Derek has. I also could use one of those flashlights that doesn't use batteries and you have to hand-crank.

• 16-MB DIMMs for my Power Mac (I think mine are 168-pin DIMMs)
• 100-MB ZIP disks (I cannot have too many)
• The math software called Mathematica (Macintosh version, of course)
• CD jewel cases
• A CD-rack, preferably identical to the one I have now that my brother bought for me
• Some sort of travel case for CDs, preferably one that can take a lot of abuse.
• Tri-met bus tickets (2-Zone or All-Zone) or a bus pass (Zones 1-2 or All-Zone)
• A Radio Cab gift certificate, if they exist (no other cab company, please)

• Candles, and lengths of wick
• Decorative envelope seals (Or, for the truly ambitious, an embossing ring to be used in dripped wax!)
• A copy of the "ashcan edition" of issue #14 of Studio Foglio's "girl genius" comic book series. This will be a true challenge to find, seeing as how they are not sold in stores or on Studio Foglio's Website. I recommend estate sales. :-)
• "Button Men" from the "girl genius" series
• One of Studio Foglio's "Act Your IQ" pins, from the "girl genius" series
• I have seen a bumper sticker around that says "Mean People Hurt." I would love this as either a bumper sticker or a pin. Ditto for "I Eat the Flesh of the Living and I Vote" and "Where do you keep your flying monkeys?" and "Ask me about my vow of silence."
• To my great amusement, it turns out that one can buy fuzzy icosahedral (i.e. 20-sided) dice, apparently in both red and green.
• The board game "Kill Doctor Lucky" from the wonderful game company Cheapass Games
• The card game "Unexploded Cow," also from Cheapass Games
• The game "Captain Park's Imaginary Polar Expedition," also from Cheapass Games
• The card game "Chez Geek"
• The card game "Munchkins"
• The faery card game "Elixir"
• model Sojourner Martian rover from Mattel
• Detailed, up-to-date, poster-sized wall maps of Mars
• poster of the cover of The Raging Quiet, by Sherryl Jordan
• poster of the cover of My Soul To Keep, by Tananarive Due
• poster of the cover of Wild Seed, by Octavia Butler. This book cover is just gorgeous. (Note: I found out recently that Wild Seed has been re-issued with a less-cool cover. The link I just gave points to the specific cover I am talking about.)
• A copy on tape of a certain old radio commercial. It was for Stanley Thermoses, and featured men singing and yelling ("Stanley! Stanley! The thermos made of steel! Stanley! Stanley! For hot drinks or a meal!"). I just really liked it, okay? So sue me. :-) It won't be the first radio commercial I have on tape.

• Exotic (non-caffeinated) tea
• Good fruit chutney or curd
• Almond butter (ideally, it should contain no traces of peanuts, so that I can share it with my sweetie)
• Almond roca
• A manatee bar. They're nummy.
• A container of Ben & Jerry's Rainforest Crunch ice cream. Of course, the main reason it is on this list is that I believe they stopped making it, so finding it is going to be a challenge . . .

• I would love to have Wish Lists from my friends and family, so that I have some clue what to get them! (And now I have eight! Woohoo!!)
• Twice now, a cordless phone I own has started to have trouble with its speakers. After I own the cordless phone for a while, my ability to hear the person on the other end becomes somewhat intermittent. I would much appreciate any clues to how to make this problem go away (or how to get a better cordless phone).
• Is there any place to go dancing in this town that (a) does not allow smoking, (b) at least occasionally plays music that came out before 1992, and (c) is not usually loud enough to cause ear pain and/or damage within 10 minutes? Bonus points if it is downtown or easy to get to from there. I could easily believe that places like this exist; I just do not want to have to find them all myself by trial and error.
• I am always on the lookout for new links for my Reuse page.
• Where can I find good, free, in-the-public-domain digital pictures of birds?
• Years ago, I was taught a very different variation of chess under the name "OSU." Looking back on it, it was clearly a version of Ultima Chess, but OSU was neither standard Ultima nor the game that goes by the name "Sir Bombalot," although OSU did have pushers, mimics, and some kind of paralyzer. I do not remember all the rules, and I would love to have the complete rules again.

• Clothing that has to be hand-washed
• Allow me to say here that when it comes to shirts and sweatshirts for me, anything below XL is generally too small.
• Anything for cars (except bumperstickers are fine, I use them in other ways)
• Anything for yards/gardens
• Flowers or other plants
• Subscriptions to newspapers or magazines (I already have all of those that I want)
• The solo albums by Amy Ray (of the Indigo Girls). They are too punk for me.
• Software that won't run on a Mac
• Cups, glasses and mugs
• Bowls, plates, etc. that aren't both microwave-safe and dishwasher-safe
• Food items that require much preparation
• Anything that has to hang on a wall (except for specific posters and other items mentioned above)
• Large furniture
• Blankets. I have recently been given homemade blankets by two different women I love, and these blankets definitely meet my needs, not to mention being snuggly and sentimental.

*Even though you might think that since I can only use one or two of these at a time, I should not need very many, this item is unfortunately on a short list of things that I seem to lose/destroy/have stolen/wear out rather quickly. More of these items would thus be appreciated.

(Last updated 8/24/02006)